Dear Harvard Freshman

            Well, I’ve moved out of my dorm, stored my stuff, and am staying with my parents in a hotel until we leave for the airport tomorrow morning. It’s been a great few days; we went all over Boston, from the Freedom Trail to the Museum of Fine Arts (MFA) to the beach. It’s nice to be done with most of my responsibilities for a while, and it’s amazing to get to see and be with my parents again.

            It’s been a wonderful year, one of the best of my life. I’ve met so many people and learned so much and done so many new things, I don’t even know where to start. I’m never quite sure, but I feel I’ve grown and matured, and I’m both sad to say a temporary goodbye to Harvard and excited for what the future holds. I’m planning on also posting during my time in Jordan, so stay tuned over the summer.

            For this last post, I thought a lot about how I should sum up the year. As I mentioned in my last blog post, I wonder sometimes what kind of person will be in my room next year. Friends and I have discussed what we would say to the person coming after us, if we were allowed to leave a note in the room. So I decided that, for my last post, I would write a letter to the freshman who will be living in my room next year.

            Dear Harvard Freshman,

            Hi! I know you’re probably feeling slightly overwhelmed right now; this is a new place, with tons of new people, and already there’s so much to do. I also know you’re getting lots of letters and advice from friends, family, proctors, deans, professors, PAFs*, academic advisors, and etc. But I feel like I learned a lot this year, and I wanted to pass on a little of that advice, so that you can start out ahead of where I was.

            I know you’re a talented, hardworking person who’s willing to do what it takes to succeed. I appreciate how hard you’ve worked to get here. You have to realize, though, that going to Harvard isn’t at all about getting into Harvard. Once you get here, the playing field is levelled; everyone goes to Harvard. That’s not special anymore; that’s not the point.

            The point is what you do here, what you learn, who you meet, how you grow. I know that at the beginning of last year, I was flooded with opportunities, so much so that I wanted to forget about all of them and do my own thing; it was just too much. But now when I look back, I wish I had taken advantage of a few more of those opportunities, whether that be Through the Gates** trips, visiting the MFA, or just jogging along the Charles more often when I lived five minutes away from it.

            My first semester, I was very focused on studying, and I did well. I learned a lot, both in and out of class, and I was a good student. But college isn’t high school; it isn’t about just being a good student, putting together a good resume. College is about being a good person; when you graduate, the list of things you did won’t be nearly as important as what those things did to you. College is a holistic experience. The academics matter, but they are part of an entire experience of living on your own, learning resourcefulness, independence, maturity, work ethic, and the like.

            So don’t study all the time. Go learn how to live. Learn how to relate to people and start independent projects and try things that are outside your comfort zone.  My second semester, I still spent time on study, but I also started hanging out with friends more, taking a leadership role in my extra-curriculars, and setting aside time to relax and try new things.

            Not, mind you, that the ‘college life’ is all it’s cracked up to be. Doing things that you know are a bad idea for the instant gratification doesn’t make you a better person; it makes you a person with regrets. Make your choices carefully, wisely. There’s nothing wrong with letting loose or indulging a little, but don’t sacrifice your future or your character for a few moments of satisfaction. Find something that’s going to be worth it instead – there are opportunities here to do so much!

            I don’t know much of anything about you. You could be from Texas or Tanzania, well-off or disadvantaged, assured of your success or wondering how you got in here at all.  But whoever you are, there’s a place here for you. There are people who will love you and care about your success, and are willing to give you all the help you need. Don’t ever feel like you’re alone; reach out for help, and I guarantee, it will be there. The professors, administrators, and students here are wonderful, and I hope you’ll grow to know and love many of them before this year’s over, just as I have.

            Best wishes for the future, and congratulations! You’re here!

            Sincerely,

            Lauren Mandaville

*PAF – Peer Advising Fellow – an upperclassman assigned to a group of freshman to provide peer-to-peer mentoring and advising

**Through the Gates – Harvard-sponsored freshman outings to cultural events and area attractions

Rushing through Reading Period

            I honestly forgot that it was Monday, and that I needed to write a blog. My week is regulated by classes, and since classes got out last Wednesday, all the time is kind of blending together. I spent most of yesterday finishing my second draft of a 12-page research paper on the BBC adaptation of Pride and Prejudice for English, and I spent pretty much all of today writing the first (and probably last) draft of a 9-page research paper on Holocaust art for Hebrew. I will spend tomorrow working with my partner on a presentation of our Physics project. The papers are due Thursday; the Physics is due Friday.

            One of the hardest parts of college is time management. As I get more and more involved in more and more things, my time to study is more and more limited. I get out of everything that’s optional, and still I find myself distracted by dozens of little things from everywhere that want to suck away my time. Yesterday and today contain almost all the time I’ve had to just sit and work, and it was really nice to finally get things done. There are only a few days left; hopefully I can stave off the panic and sense of being overwhelmed that are also counterproductive. My usual method of doing that is to catalogue my to-do list, write it down, and then start crossing things off, which as you can see, I am doing subconsciously by now, since that’s how I started this post. However, having gotten that out, I can actually write about the rest of my week.

            One recent highlight was our “Secret Angel” week for the seniors in my a cappella group. It’s about the same thing as Secret Santa, except that of course it’s not Christmas, and involved one or two of us buying themed gifts for one senior from Monday until Saturday, when we had our senior appreciation dinner. It’s a new tradition – we started this year – and I’m kind of ambivalent toward it. On the one hand, it was really sweet, and the seniors really loved it, and I really love the seniors, so I loved it. On the other hand, it’s another one of those parasitical responsibilities that I can’t get out of, that keeps sucking away my precious time, so I occasionally wanted to strangle it.

            I also wasn’t too sure about the dinner at first. As treasurer, I’m already biased against new sources of spending, and the hour before the dinner was spent in the middle of a lot of yelling, rushing, and general chaos. We bought the food and commandeered the cutlery and dishes from the dining hall (we were in a room above it, and don’t worry – we brought it all back afterwards!) The dinner, however, was lovely. We spent most of our time discussing all the gifts from the week, from the point of view of the givers and the recipient.

            After the dinner was over, we were suddenly informed that, as the new members of the group, we needed to invent choreo and perform to a couple minutes of the song “Wrecking Ball”. Yes, that one. I know, hazing on the last week of school – strange. However, it was fun, and we were laughing so hard I don’t think anyone actually felt embarrassed, despite the fact that we are all fairly quiet introverts. And afterwards, we had a sorting ceremony; no one was expecting that, either. I’m in Ravenclaw. And yes, there were people in Slytherin. It’s hard to describe in a few sentences, but the evening went very well, and I returned home unproductive but happy.

            Home. I don’t mean that in the same sense that I mean my home where I grew up, with my parents. But this is my room, my space, that I have made my own, that has seen me in my private moments and sheltered me throughout the year from the cold and the rain and the hullabaloo of the outdoors. And yet, in a few short months, someone else will come into this room, and it will be as much their room as it is mine right now. And before it was mine, it was someone else’s. It makes me feel kind of strange, transient – I’m just passing through; this place doesn’t really belong to me.

            I suppose*, though, that dorm rooms are no different from any other rooms. Even if you build the house when you get there and tear it down when you leave, the ground will still be there; you can’t take it with you. Generations come and generations go, but the earth remains forever.”** We’re all, after all, just passing through. And yet, how much stuff you can accumulate in a dorm room after only a year! How much stuff must we accumulate in a lifetime! But you can’t take it with you. I suppose life’s kind of like college – the real purpose in coming is to see how much you can learn, how much you can grow, before you leave again.

            Speaking of leaving, this post is much longer than I was expecting. I’ve obviously spent too much time drawing out deep meanings for my papers. I will post one more time for this semester, but I’m considering posting about my experiences in Jordan over the summer, if you all are interested in reading, so stay tuned! A week from tomorrow, I’ll be flying home!

PS - I forgot to mention - our performance on Saturday went well, too! There are a couple of pictures that I took of the band a few of our a cappella members also formed for the occasion!

*I know, that’s the hint – philosophical musing coming up!

**Ecclesiastes 1:4